Just to recap, we left off with places 50 – 26 decided in the search for the best TikTok songs money can buy. However, most of the songs in the previous list were pretty awful and only really became listenable the lower down they came in the rankings. In part two, you can expect a list where, not only will almost every song be at least semi-decent, the overall best TikTok song will be crowned. I know how desperate you must be to read this fascinating blog post, so I won’t continue to meander with unnecessary introductory paragraphs, so here’s the damn list:
25. Sleepy Hallow, Fousheé – ‘Deep End Freestyle’
A VERY iconic TikTok song gets the top 25 off to a pretty good start. It’s normally the first few seconds that people are interested in on ‘Deep End Freestyle’ due to the memorable sample and explosive entrance from Sleepy Hallow, but the rest of the song hits just as hard. It’s not too long, it’s all killer no filler, and it’s an unexpectedly solid delivery from the rapper. Good stuff.
24. Kina, Au/Ra – ‘Feel Again’
‘Feel Again’ is perfect for those of you who carefully curate sex playlists. Moody, raw, and intoxicating, the instrumental was designed for one thing and one thing only. Add on top of that the presence of male and female vocalists and it’s abundantly clear what Kina and Au/Ra were going for, and they pull it off.
23. Rod Wave – ‘Heart On Ice’
Okay. Yes it is a bit corny now but there is no disputing the power of Rod Wave’s vocal ability. He sounds like he’s in real pain when he sings, not in the Yoko Ono way, but in a really dominant and controlled manner. Undeniable talent.
22. Freddie Dredd – ‘Opaul’
This one is only really here because of how much I enjoy the first drop. It’s peculiarly unique. It shouldn’t work but it does. While I’m not overly enthusiastic about the verse, it does a decent job of breaking up the song and avoiding the label of ‘stale’ being applied to it. The three distinct parts grow progressively distorted and it’s definitely intriguing. Would suit a Travis Scott style remix possibly.
21. The Dave Brubeck Quartet – ‘Kathy’s Waltz’
‘Kathy’s Waltz’ is essentially the pistachio ice cream of this list. It’s almost exclusively enjoyed by the elderly or Starbucks-drinking, spectacle-wearing hipsters. The ‘memed bit’ is actually really sonically pleasing and relaxing, which is fairly surprising for something gaining traction from the frantic nature of TikTok. Quality little tune perfect for rainy days, if that’s your thing.
20. LIL MAYO – ‘Be Gone Thot!’
Maybe I’m a sucker for meme trap. Why do I enjoy this? I think I need therapy. The beat is disturbingly hard and the angelic ‘aaah’ that follows LIL MAYO’s declaration: “I’m a man of God” is that type of comedic gold that makes tracks like this somewhat viable. So bad its good? Or have I just lost all validity?
19. DaBaby, Roddy Ricch – ‘ROCKSTAR’
In what will undoubtedly be a controversial placement for some, this outrageously popular track was tainted for me by one Addison Rae. Her dancing haunts me like the most persistent sleep paralysis demon. I close my eyes and see her smile that is so enthusiastic it tears the sides of her face like Heath Ledger’s joker. Terrifying.
18. BENEE, Gus Dapperton – ‘Supalonely’
Hated it at first, but it grew on me massively. I’ve not listened to too much of BENEE’s catalogue, but I think ‘Supalonely’ is disguising a really great voice under there. She’s almost in her own lane with what she brings to the table and is definitely one to watch in the future. I was also happy to see the Gus Dapperton feature on here and for him to have another hit song after ‘Prune, You Talk Funny’ and ‘I’m Just Snacking’ which are two of my favourite songs from the last decade of music. Great stuff from the pair. Would love to see them link up again.
17. The Future Kingz – ‘3 Vets’
Renz, who handles the hook on ‘3 Vets’, should be bigger. He’s similar to Young Adz in the way that he completely carries his group. He’s got a crystal clear voice that is way too easy on the ears and could really benefit from a ‘T R A P S O U L’ style release where everything’s slowed down a bit and he can refine his craft further. Really solid track here, though, and despite the other members not being as memorable as Renz, they produce good verses and support well.
16. Hippie Sabotage – ‘Devil Eyes’
This relaxed slow-burner from Hippie Sabotage utilises its slow, atmospheric instrumentation to transport the listener to an eternal sunset where the alcohol never stops, leaving everything a golden haze. The absolute definition of a convertible car on an empty highway song. Oozes excellence for the entirety of the run time.
15. Surf Mesa, Emilee – ‘ily (I love you baby)’
Sliding seamlessly from one summer vibe to another, ‘ily’ whimsically remixes a classic for 2020. It’s one of those that could easily be a miss, but somehow sticks the landing despite twisting what is undoubtedly a lot of people’s all time favourite songs. It’s king of like Walter White’s ‘blue sky’ product. It’s in the same family as some really dangerous stuff, but is the pinnacle of its kind.
14. Trevor Daniel – ‘Falling’
This one really came out of nowhere, didn’t it? A grower not a shower, it’s gotten better on every listen for me. I just love songs as moody as this which carry a a certain sassiness in the way they handle experience and the future. It’s almost like Trevor Daniel is emerging from the darkness by the end of the track with the subtle piano and backing vocal fade out and I’m here for it.
13. Lil Mosey – ‘Blueberry Faygo’
Undeniably one of the biggest hits of the year so far, Lil Mosey certainly backs up his ‘Certified Hitmaker’ claim that serves as the title of his 2020 album. This one will have even the sworn enemies of hip hop nodding along and toe tapping. I wonder how many times people have just randomly burst into the chorus aloud when sat in their quarantine dungeons? Probably a lot.
12. Cookie Kawaii – ‘Vibe (If I Back It Up)’
Why is this not longer? There is so much remix/sample potential with this track that it’s actually incomprehensible. Short but sweet, its the perfect balance between punchy and calm, plosive and dreamy. I’ve honestly never heard anything quite like it and it kind of sounds like the future? After its viral success, don’t be surprised to hear more songs just like this.
11. Benny Benassi, The Biz – ‘Satisfaction – Uk Radio Edit’
One of several tracks experiencing a renaissance thanks to TikTok, this indisputable banger from all the way back in 2003 remains a timeless classic. It wasn’t until I got a proper speaker that I truly appreciated it, either. The base on the first drop is mind blowing. It crashes over you like a metallic wave of vibrations and unpredictability, leaving you in euphoria as Benny Benassi continues on with one of the most iconic dance tracks of all time. Probably should be higher on this list, but oh well.
10. Missy Elliott, Ciara, Fatman Scoop – ‘Lose Control’
I wish I was 18 in the mid noughties when this track dropped because I bet this was class in the club. Fatman Scoop is like the hype man that made it big as he goes ahead to force everyone “up” and gets their hands in the air. Missy Elliott is in top form too, with the addition of Ciara complementing her delivery flawlessly.
9. Lucas Estrada, Henri Purnell, NEIMY – ‘In My Fantasy’
We’re finally into single digits now, and what better way to begin than with this belter. Inexplicably good. Maybe its the whistling, maybe its the vocals, maybe its the production. Whatever it is, its great. The track came dangerously close to being too sweet and sugary, but stays its course without fault, leaving us with a delightful listen.
8. Topic, A7S – ‘Breaking Me’
The absolute best example of music that sounds like it belongs on Love Island. Not only is it an infectious summer dance track, but the vocals are so powerful that they elevate this track to transcendent status, pushing the boundaries for what can be done with songs like this. It almost carries a dance-for-your-life level of desperation which should serve as the perfect closer to a night out. One last hoorah.
7. Breakbot, Irfane – ‘Baby I’m Yours’
The ultimate meme song. First time listeners would be surprised to learn that ‘ladies and gentlemen, we got ’em’ is not a genuine part of this track. It outlives its meme because of its sheer genius which, I reckon, has a 99.9% chance of raising your mood after listening. Just a really good time.
6. Niko B – ‘Who’s That What’s That’
Once again, Niko B emerges from obscurity to deliver us an absolute banger. Walking the tight rope that tilters between comedy and seriousness, Niko B traverses the rope with ease, landing with genuine musical integrity rarely seen from artists who try to do the same thing. He might be a bit of a joker, but he’s got mad potential and this is just the start.
5. SALES – ‘Chinese New Year’
Not only is this one of my favourite TikTok songs, but one of my favourite songs I’ve discovered this entire year. It’s a kind of twisted nostalgia trip in the sense that it makes you recall memories you’ve never even had. Proper weird stuff. It’s genuinely so close to perfection its frightening. Absolutely in love with this track.
4. The Weeknd – ‘Blinding Lights’
In reality, this would never have made a list specially dedicated to TikTok songs if it hadn’t spawned a viral dance out of nowhere. It’s a really interesting reinvention of The Weeknd and its success is thoroughly deserved. You all know the song by heart at this point, so you all know how great it is. I don’t really need to say anything else, to be honest. A truly great song.
3. Gorillaz – ‘Dirty Harry’
Taking the bronze is ‘Dirty Harry’. It’s been around for ages, but I hadn’t heard it in such a long time before I descended into the murky underworld that is TikTok. I was so surprised to find that this track is normally supported by videos of people dressing up in various outfits, both serious and not so. I’m not too sure what the link is there, but I’ll take it if it means I get to write about one of Gorillaz’ best ever songs. It still sounds futuristic even now which just goes to show how competition-free Gorillaz are in the Pantheon of musical excellence.
2. Melanie Martinez – ‘Play Date’
First I had this song at 11. Then down to 7. Now it’s number 2. First of all, the conceit of kindergarten innocence is, ahem, genius. It works so damn well, especially when Martinez’ then proceeds to swear without a second thought during the hook. It knocks you for six because its just so unexpected from a song that audibly twinkles as much as this, but I LOVE IT. Melanie Martinez wrote all the songs on her debut album from the perspective of a character called ‘Cry Baby’ in the same way Tyler The Creator wrote ‘IGOR’. And it would appear that this is a recipe for success, as ‘Play Date’ continues to be revolutionary five years on from its release.
1. Juice WRLD – ‘Robbery’
And here it is, the best song that regularly appears on TikTok. And to be honest, its not even close. Despite his tragically short career, Juice WRLD left the world with as solid a catalogue as any artist, imprinting his name on the history of music with his genre-melding and innovation. ‘Robbery’ is a beautiful yet disturbing insight into the psyche of Juice WRLD and its performance, both recorded and live, is so fuelled by passion and emphasis that it can crack even the toughest of nuts. The piano coupled with the emotional vocals make for a truly iconic track. RIP Juice WRLD.
And that’s the list. It’s been about two weeks in the making all together and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from listening to Tiagz on repeat to understand what I thought about his music. This whole process will probably be repeatable somewhere down the line so I’ll most likely revive it at some point. Perhaps I’ll go easier on myself next time, and just stick to the songs that won’t give me PTSD from listening to them. Thanks for reading xoxox
The Turntable 